so sometimes i get cocky. and i tell myself, self, you've built up an immunity to spicy foods. cuz you dump crushed red peppers on your pizza. and you dump cayenne in your chile. and you snarf spicy sauce like it's chicken soup. so you tell your husband, husband, buy me the most spicy salsa in the store. and i look at the bottle husband brings home and i read "caution: scary hot." i roll my eyes and scoff.
it feels like someone dipped my tongue in lighter fluid and took a match to it. i feel injured. i think that stuff is illegal or something.